Off The Wagon

I've been told I am "off the wagon". Off the wagon? What does that mean? I mean, what's up with the wagon? I decided to research that phrase in order to understand why someone would believe that this amazing pinnacle of athleticism is "off" said wagon.

In the late 1800's and early 1900's several temperance organizations arose. Temperance, for all you boozers out there, is basically a No-Alcohol belief. The Anti-Saloon League, The Woman's Christian Temperance Union, The Abstinence Society all encouraged the men of their day to take "The Pledge." This was a specific and absolute promise never to drink again. And you can believe that it was taken very seriously. During this period in history there existed "water-carts." These carts did not carry drinking water, but rather carried nasty water that was used to dampen down the dirt roads that became so dusty. Many of the men would say that they would rather drink water from the "water-carts" than let a drop of liquor touch their tongues. Over time "water-cart" became "water-wagon" which intern became just "wagon." Someone who happened to break their pledge was then said to be "off the wagon"

There you have it. Just so you know, when I was told I was "off the wagon" it was not in reference to my gin and tonic consumption. No, the reference was to my dedication to diet and a healthy way of life. So what does "off the wagon" really look like. I guess you start with 185 lbs. That's pretty obvious. It looks like Doughboys pizza or Mexican for lunch every other day. It looks like donuts and oreos. It looks like ice cream with chocolate syrup. Oh wow... I really am off the wagon.

How do I get back on the wagon? What if I just decide to do it? Can the wagon just slow down a little or does it have to come to a complete stop in order for me to jump on? Hey!! What if I just get partially on the wagon? You know, just put one leg on.... I'm not quite sure that would work. Crap, there is no way around it.

Step one: Decide to do it. Step two: Get a running start. Step three: Jump back on. Step four: repeat if necessary.

When it comes to God, most of us at one time or another have fallen or maybe even jumped off the wagon. We all know what it looks like; apathy, misplaced anger, lack of patience, selfish, meanness, delighting in the pain of others. Yeah, I think we have all been there at sometime. Where are you now? Are you on the wagon? Are you completely off the wagon? Did you slip, fall, or jump off? Are you trying to keep one foot on and one foot off? Maybe you don't even believe in the wagon. Let me encourage you to hop on. Come on, give the wagon a try. I guarantee that this water is good. Good to the last unending drop. So.....

Step one: Decide to do it. Step two: Get a running start. Step three: Jump on. Step four: repeat if necessary.